Stag-nay-shons.

The title lingo is from Cute Overload. I live there right now.

Anyhow, I've been meaning to write for a while. And gotten a smidge of pressure on the VisageTome about it, so voilà, here I am.

First, some business of sorts: I never finished writing about my 3-week Vietnam adventure, for a few reasons. Primarily, I lost the momentum, and it took so much effort to get all the photos up on Facebook, due to internet troubles, that once I got 'em up there I felt done with the sharing. Secondarily, work got super stressful, leaving me with very little energy to write about the trip, when I just wanted to get home and vent about work. Which I also didn't want to do, so I avoided blogging altogether. My apologies. All my photos, minus those taken by new friend Katy in Halong Bay when my camera was broken, are online now. If you're not a Facebook friend and want to see them, let me know, I'll send you the public links.

So. There's that.

Today's topic is: stagnation. And, I suppose, perspective. Usually I am good at perspective, knowing when something really, truly matters and when it doesn't, and how it'll work out in the long run. Something that I am really bad at is being nice to myself. I never really let myself off the hook for stuff, such as watching too much television, or not "going out" enough, etc. I tell myself that I am lame, and a loser, etc. And I'm working on this. However, it's even harder after returning from my trip, because my trip was exciting and adventurous, and I had no time to loaf around like I generally do. Then, returning to the grind and being thrown back into work, where I am frequently thinking What the hell am I doing here, I lose the adventurous steam that I was running on before. I'm exhausted, I get home, I find a show to watching online, I do crosswords, I lie around. And I feel utterly useless. And then I get to calling myself names, and it all gets depressing from there. And, frankly, it sucks.

Recently, while wallowing in my perceived loserdom, a friend of mine gave me a reality check. Some perspective. He said, "Look Arielle, so what that you're not out tonight, and that you're home loading CSI: NY online, and feeling sorry for yourself? You are NOT a loser." He reminded me that, while on that particular night I felt like a loaf, like I should be working out or doing some art or--ahem--blogging or reading or something, when in fact I didn't want to leave my bed, that I am, in truth, not a loaf. In the grand scheme of my life. Lazy bums with no motivations or ambitions do not move to Ho Chi Minh City for a job. They don't go gallavanting around Vietnam by themselves for fun, the don't go to Cambodia on vacation and hug elephants (see much earlier post for those details). Put into perspective, I am an interesting person. And I have to tell myself that a lot, because then maybe eventually I'll believe it.

It helps that I have amazing friends, who will a) give me reality checks when I need them (and when I think I don't, which is also when I do) and b) think I'm interesting enough to want to read my thoughts here, on the interwebs. I feel super appreciated, and I hope you do, too. Thank you.

That'll be it for now. Love.